6/26/2008

Update on trip!!

First let me say I AM SOOOOO HAPPY TO BE HOME!!!
Wow!!! I don't even know where to start in telling you about my trip! I guess I should start with 3 months ago TODAY my friend/mentor took on the challenge of helping me "get on the other side of my pain" so I could be the woman God created me to be and "get on about my business"...3 months ago I sat in the prayer room with her at church and shared with her EVERYTHING (I don't do that!) and she made the commitment to walk through this with me..and she did!....I have been in counseling for a year this month and on meds for depression so it isn't like I haven't been trying kwim? I just didn't know what else TO DO:::shrug:::I was doing all I KNEW to do but that wasn't working....Anyway, God totally orchestrated the next few months...I was so hungry to learn and she was the willing vessel God used. He could have used anyone but most people don't listen to that still small voice.... I am thankful she did....I wonder if she knows how prophetic her words were 3 months ago when she said
And as I have told you all along........you are on the verge of something BIG......more than you can even dream up......not only will you get through this, but there is some BIG restoration coming ahead
In May she came over my place with some other prayer warriors and took authority in my home and the nightmares that I have had for almost 23yrs ended that night! GONE! In fact, A LOT has happened in the last few months on a spiritual level that I can't even explain. I have found my voice and figured out who *I* am and guess what? I actually like me! I have learned NOT to live by feelings but to make decisions and live by what Gods word tells me...I don't have to feel anything if I know the truth. The FACT is I have been hurt by those who shouldn't have hurt me but the TRUTH is I am a child of God and He loves me! He promises double for my trouble so I have learned to forgive, pray for them and then wait and expect my blessing;-) It's a comin!! I have also been released from counseling and I am OFF my meds..I haven't been happier than I am now!! EVER!!
So back to my trip....I was SOO nervous about going back and to be honest the first few days I was so homesick for Oklahoma! I wanted to come home!! BUT I made the decision that I was going to operate in truth and to take my thoughts captive...if I hadn't done that my thoughts would have become words and they would have become actions etc....I had to continuously pray my way through the trip but by the end I could see God was ALL OVER IT!! I knew I served a BIG God but I never expected all of this!!!...I only prayed I would get through the trip but God allowed restoration. I can look back at home with fond memories and know that I truly can do ANYTHING with God on my side..."when you face your fears you become FEARLESS" and I AM fearless! I serve a MIGHTY God and He loves me! Leaving my children was probably the hardest thing I did but my kids are very grounded in the Word and I have to believe that God will protect them from all the evil they are in....Plus my daughter is very outspoken and is preaching the Word at 8 yo lol Hands on the hips and all!! Gotta love having one child that is choleric!! My oldest also really stepped up to the plate and acknowledged he would have to be the spiritual head of the household while they are there...I just hate what divorce does to families but I KNOW my God can work it all out for good because we love Him!
Ok what am I leaving out??? hmmmm I went to Jacksonville, Fl for a few days before my parents and I drove to Ringgold, GA (about 8hrs)...my brother has a farm with a store on it to sell his product...we also sold at the Farmers Market! There is some big thing going on about tomatoes and salmonella so he was on TV (the Judy show??)and in the Chattanooga Times Free Press...it was the June 19th edition..front page of the B section and you can see my brother, Ken (yes! that really IS his name!) and my Mom. I was able to pick fresh veggies from the garden AND collect eggs from 200 chickens!! Stupid things kept pecking my hands!! Oh and a DUCK flew INTO my head!! I am NOT KIDDING!! I think that is why people yell "DUCK" and not bird or pigeon or chicken...just duck because they are stupid! So are chickens!! I can tell you this I AM NOT A FARMER!! Still it was nice to see family:-) We came home after a few days and I was able to see more old friends in Florida. On Monday we drove to Orlando for me to catch my flight...don't ask lol It had to do with market realignment and bankruptcy with the airline....anyway, after 18 hrs of traveling and delayed flights and LONG BUMPY flights I was home...my dear friend picked me up at 1am and I came home to CRASH IN MY BED...oh how great it feels to be HOME!! It felt great to go to MY church last night. I have missed everyone SO MUCH and I am SO EXCITED to be home...and on the other side of my pain:-)...God is SO GOOD! If *I* can get over all that I have been through and relearn some MAJOR things...ANYONE can! God truly is the God of restoration!!

3 comments:

mamabeck said...

Barb...this is wonderful to read. You "sound" rejuvenated!!! SO glad you went, and came home with a new energy!
God Bless!
beck

Sarah said...

I am sooooo happy for you! Glad you are back and healing.

Beloved said...

You're back!!

I have been with cows this past week...and mountains...

I'll be back July 11th!

So glad to hear it went ok.